Dealing with Jealousy

Photo Credit: ShadeMgmt

Read time: 4 minutes

Jealousy has a variety of layers, from spiritual to natural and is based on relational differences. Our focus is the type of jealousy one experiences when it comes to self-comparison. Jealousy is usually the result of not fully knowing one’s worth. Many of us have been stifled by the state of jealousy; unable to move forward to fulfill destiny.

Here are 3 truths about jealousy and how not to walk in it.

Learned Behavior

Often times jealousy is a learned behavior bred by an adult or authoritative figure. This could be a parent, older sibling, aunt, or teacher. Society and culture also teach the behavior of jealousy through competition. You, like many, may have been openly compared to another sibling, student, or peer. It sounds like “why aren’t you more like your sister?” or “you need to be more like this student.” Favoritism is also a breeding ground for jealousy. It is basically separating one from another by holding high regard to a person over the other.

Another version of jealousy being a learned behavior or paradigm is being told someone else is jealous of you. For example, popular individuals tend to be told others are simply jealous aka “haters”. What this does is forms a perspective in said popular person to see others as envious.

The only way to defeat this form of jealousy is to simply unlearn it. Renewing your mind to the reality of your greatness will lay a foundation that will uproot this philosophy. Knowing who you are called to be leaves no room for jealousy.

A Spirit Not a Person

When we are honest with ourselves, we will start to see a pattern of people who we may have felt jealousy towards. For example, you may find yourself jealous of individuals who make a lot of money or travel or wear what you consider fashionable clothing. You may be jealous of the person with a family or nice home. You may find yourself being jealous of people with a certain length of hair or skin type. What we must realize is this, jealousy doesn’t exist towards a person but what that person represents. It is a way of thinking. It represents those who we may have been compared to, what we desire for ourselves, or areas of insecurity.

When you experience the spirit of jealousy rise within you, stop and take a deep breath. And then ask: What am I seeing in this person that recalls a past memory? In what way am I comparing myself to this person? What personal desire does this person possess? What insecurity is this individual revealing to me?

There’s Room for All of Us

You will soon learn, there’s room for all of us to blossom and exist in our own greatness. There is an abundance of life and gifts for us all to walk in our designed lanes and still cheer each other on. One of the biggest challenges in jealousy is this notion that there can only be one. Or in order for you to be raised up someone has to be brought low.

Again, there is room for all of us.



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